The key to gaining confidence

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The key to gaining confidence

How much time do you spend trying to fit in, pleasing others or giving your energy to people you don’t really like or situations you don’t even enjoy?   It’s amazing how much we put up with or in basic terms – how much we are willing to suffer.

The catalyst here is our lack of understanding of who we actually are.   Your environment becomes an eclectic mix of other people’s desires, passions, needs and wants.   Somewhere along the way…… you forgot what set YOU on fire?   You started to follow the leader.   There is being complacent and just being and then there is living and doing and enjoying and feeling electric.

How do you get the latter? You date yourself!   Some good old methods of romance, open ended questions and FUN while adopting the ever important phrase – me, myself and I.   Not only will this be your best investment – it will be the one relationship that will time and time again deliver on your heart’s desire.   Is it easy?   Well I personally don’t think any relationship is easy – it’s a constant exploration and refinement.   Things evolve.   FUN yes….. easy NO…. worth it YES!!

I’ve done the hard work and created some great dates to get you started.   Just show up and let the fun begin:

  1. Discover your love language – how do you like to be loved? This will cut through the games in relationships – you will know exactly what makes you happy.  http://www.5lovelanguages.com/
  2. Get your creative craft on –fill a scrap book of pictures that reflect a life you aspire too. It can be foods, clothes, types of relationships, houses, cars, animals, holiday destinations, words, colours etc
  3. Quadrant planning – Relationships/ Finances/ Self-love/ Health – how do you want to FEEL in these areas of your life? Abundant? Empowered? Healthy?   Write a list. Pick a few key words.  These words become your filter. Every decision goes through this filter.

With these dates under your belt, confidence and focus will become your new friend.   Life will get easier and you may even be compelled to make a few changes.   Decision making will be faster, you have your filter.
Invest in yourself – it’s oh so worth it! x

About the Author:

Tarryn Bellingham is corporate health and wellness coach and a yoga and mindfulness teacher.

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