How to connect with others and deepen relationships.

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How to connect with others and deepen relationships.

This has been a new ‘aha’ moment for me over the last few months.   I was listening to a Gabby Bernstein podcast where she talked about the risk of putting others up on a peddle stool.   Her message was simple: When you do this, you are reducing your chance for connection.   The energy is off.

This got me thinking about two things: judgement and confidence (these two go hand in hand).

I know in the past I have been quick to play small with others who I perceived as superior for whatever reason – their age, their accomplishments, knowledge or confidence.   Judging others is an instant ticket to unhappyville as you give away your power and throw your self-worth under the bus.

Don’t get me wrong – admiring someone like a mentor is healthy but idolising them is not.   Respecting others is crucial but do remember that respecting yourself is even more important.

For whatever shoddy beliefs I had picked up along the way – I had made an assumption that there was a hierarchy in people.   Little did I realise that this was not only blocking a deeper relationship with others but new opportunities and ultimately my own happiness and success.

Sometimes all it takes a mind-set shift and in this case it was exactly that:   I realised that we are all the same.   It sounds ridiculously simple and it is BUT the outcome has been magic – it’s given more freedom and confidence to put myself out there and embrace life.

At the end of the day we are all love – (like a gorgeous newborn baby) and overtime we attach ourselves to shoddy beliefs and assumptions.   We start to define others based on these beliefs and in turn our confidence and wellbeing takes a dive.

So here is the GOLD….Take it back to basics ladies!

When you approach people with the belief that you are the same, you show up as your funky awesome self and the energy you give off is authentic and people pick up on that vibe.    People feel more comfortable in your company, they relax, potentially let down their guard and a deeper connection can be formed.   Yes, not everyone is going to like you and that is completely normal BUT at least you are keeping your power intact and your door open for growth and connection.

At the end of the day we are all human and as humans we crave connection with others.   Trust that you are already fabulous as you are. Expect shifts in energy and some amazing tangible results will appear.

To your health and happiness always!
xx

About the Author:

Tarryn Bellingham is corporate health and wellness coach and a yoga and mindfulness teacher.

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